The brown bottles that separated the two men across the picnic table had now brought them together. Ryan was spending the summer at his grandfather’s house in New Canaan, the longest time that he had ever spent with the man. They had dusted off his home-brewing equipment, Grandpa’s long-forgotten hobby, and the results sat between them. The old man picked up a bottle, poured the dark foaming liquid into his glass, and took a large swallow.
“I’m not sure what taste you were aiming for, but I like this.” His smile was an expression that Ryan rarely witnessed.
The boy followed suit, smiling at his own taste. “There’s a winter ale made by one of the craft breweries in Cleveland. It’s real popular on campus right before Christmas break. Can’t even find it after New Year’s.” The young man took another swig. “I’d like to compare them side-by-side, because I think ours is better.”
“The fruits of one’s own labor are always sweeter,” Grandpa’s dour expression had returned, but was betrayed by his smiling eyes. The pair sipped again in a shared silence as a trio of white moths danced in the air over one of the old man’s tall purple flowers in his ill-tended garden. Ryan had spent as much time as he could spare weeding the beds when he wasn’t at his summer job, but the garden still needed more work.
“No, I think we really have something here. I’m going to call some of my friends and have them try it.”
“Might want to save it for yourself. Doubt if we’ll have time to brew another batch before you’re due back at school.”
“I can always come up on a weekend. New Canaan’s only a two hour drive from Columbus.”
His grandfather didn’t respond, and the boy wondered again if was actually welcome, or simply tolerated as an unwanted family obligation. After another taste he added, “This stuff is so good, maybe I’ll drop out and become a brewer.”
“Maybe you should finish college first Ryan. One more year and you’ll have your degree. Your father would crap his pants if you quit now. He
is still paying for your school, isn’t he?”
“Oh yeah. Thanks to you I suppose. He said you paid for his school and he was going to pay for mine. Said I had to do the same for my kids. Not that I’m sure I’ll ever have any.”
“What’s that supposed to mean? When your girlfriend came to visit last month, you two were going at it like a couple of rabbits. You didn’t think I couldn’t hear, did you?”
Ryan blushed and swallowed more beer, smiled briefly at the memory, then frowned when he thought about the reality of their situation. “Well, Jenny’s probably going to get hired by one of the big accounting firms. She’ll be working ninety or a hundred hours per week, until she makes partner or they wear her out. I have no idea where I’m going to get a job with a degree in chemistry. We may not last until graduation.”
“I see,” the old man said, even though he really didn’t understand the obstacles. “So could we sell this recipe to a brewery? Make you a nice nest egg and give you some options.”
“I doubt if we’d get that much for it. The big breweries don’t care because they make so much money selling that weak piss they peddle, and the little guys don’t have enough money.”
A bee landed on the open mouth of Ryan’s beer bottle and he watched as Grandpa reached his mottled hand out and waved the pest away. “It’s nice out here in the garden. You don’t come out here much do you?”
“This was always Maggie’s passion. Your grandmother used to have a big vegetable garden out back there, where the big weeds are now.” He waved vaguely toward the fence at the back of his lot.
“Do you miss Grandma?”
“What kind of fool question is that?” the old man snarled. “Of course I miss her. Miss her every damn day. We had fifty good years together, then a couple that weren’t so good. Took her too damn long to die. Shouldn’t have been like that. She didn’t deserve it.” He paused, remembering Ryan’s pain when his mother died far too young. “Your mother didn’t deserve it either.” He took another swallow of beer and stared into the surface of the old picnic table, as if answers could be found in the weathered wood.
“I’m sorry Grandpa. That’s not what I meant. I mean, you seem so…self-contained, is all. It’s like you don’t need anyone.”
“Is that what you think of me? I don’t need anyone?”
“I don’t know. You spend a lot of time alone. Reading and stuff.”
“A man gets used to his routines. I suppose it’s just a rut I’ve gotten into, and it’s too much trouble to get out. That reminds me, we need to go to the library again. Are they open tonight?”
Ryan checked his watch then thought a minute before answering. “No, they close in a few minutes. They open at ten tomorrow and don’t close ‘til nine at night. I should be done with work early, we can go then.”
“Damn summer hours. I can never remember the schedule. They’re open ‘til nine every night in the fall through spring. Guess people just don’t read as much anymore.”
“Probably not Grandpa. But they do have other options, too. Computers, electronic readers, that sort of thing. They don’t need to go to the library because it comes to them. Maybe you could get a Kindle, or an iPad.”
“That’s one of those electronic tablet things, right?” Grandpa asked. Ryan nodded. Maybe the old man wasn’t as backward as he thought. “No thanks. I like the weight of a book in my hand. It’s something substantial. Something you can feel.”
Ryan picked up his empty beer bottle and stared through the brown glass. “Well I can feel this stuff. You want to split another one before I rustle us up some dinner?”
“I shouldn’t…but OK. It is damn tasty,” Grandpa chuckled. “Maybe we should try another batch. See if we can catch the magic again.”
“Now you’re talkin’ Grandpa. I could drop out of school and we could open our own brew pub.”
“You seem fixed on the idea of quitting school boy. Something you need to tell me?”
Ryan swirled the dark liquid in his glass, raising a thin layer of beige foam on the surface, then sampled some more. Finally he looked up, meeting the old man’s gaze. “I don’t know. I just wonder if I’m doing the right thing, you know? Like, did I choose the right path? I know that Dad made a lot of money as a stockbroker, but he never really seemed happy about it. I mean, he was pretty cool when he made some big score and raked in some huge money. He’d party pretty hard, buy us neat stuff and all that, but he didn’t really seem to enjoy himself. You know what I mean?”
Grandpa eyed the young man as if some stranger sat across from him, a stranger offering insight that far exceeded the level of experience that the young man should have expressed at his age. Finally he said, “Yes, I do know what you mean. I worked for years at the appliance plant in middle management. It was a good job. Paid decent wages, with a good pension, too. But I’ll tell you, I don’t think I ever really enjoyed my job. It used to be enough to provide for the family, but at what cost? Don’t get me wrong, I love your father, but I was already over thirty when he was born. I didn’t think Maggie and I were ever going to have a child, but then she conceived. By the time your dad was old enough for me, I was at work all the time and was too old for him. We never got real close.”
As a pair of white moths scaled a purple blossom, both men, young and old, disappeared in their own thoughts for a few minutes, sitting together in solitude, but separated by a gulf of life experiences that neither one could comprehend about the other. Ryan felt the same way about his dad, who was thirty when Ryan was born, and spent long hours at the brokerage office. He had only made it to a few of the baseball games that meant so much to Ryan when he was growing up. Now that Dad had remarried, the gulf between father and son had widened. Rather than spend the summer with his dad and his new family, Ryan had sought refuge with the grandfather that he hardly knew, but was glad that he was getting to know the old man better.
His grandfather had an old-fashioned sort of…what was it…he was
solid. He spoke his mind, that was for sure. But he listened, too. They had discussed the issues of the day. The old man was probably more liberal than Ryan was. Didn’t care about gay marriage, didn’t really comprehend homosexuals, but said it was their business, not his. Grandpa thought that most women’s issues were not his concern either. He said he had never faced sexual discrimination, never carried a child in his womb, why should he have a say in it? He also thought most of the new bankers were crooks. Them and the Wall Street boys, too. Although he had never come out and said so directly, Ryan got the feeling that Grandpa lumped his dad into the group of financial men that couldn’t be trusted.
Grandpa took a last swig from his glass of beer and smiled at the taste and at his grandson across the table. Then his face twisted in a serious look that Ryan had never before witnessed. The old man cleared his throat then turned his head and spat into the flower bed, scaring up a couple of bees and a yellow butterfly. He turned back to face the boy, locking his eyes in his own serious gaze. Finally he uttered a single word. “Listen.”
Between the word ‘listen’ and your own response to the advice that will follow lies an almost infinite range of potential actions or possibilities. A person can like what he hears, or hear something else entirely, something clouded by his own thoughts or desires. He can chose to follow the advice, or ignore it completely, or take a middle course. Like or dislike, heed the advice or scorn it. It all happens in an instant and it’s up to the individual to make the best decision possible based on imperfect information in an impossibly short time frame. Ryan locked his eyes on the cloudy blue eyes of his grandfather and did as he was told. He listened.
“If you want to try to market this stuff, I’ll back you best as I can. I got a fairly big nest egg saved up, and I don’t need much to live on. You can drop out of school if that’s what you really want to do. Hell Steve Jobs and Bill Gates were both dropouts, and it never hurt them. But here’s what I think you should do instead. Go back to school and finish your degree. Maybe take a couple of extra business courses and learn anything you can about the beer business. Use the library to research your market. Make a plan and think about it. Maybe you could talk that girlfriend of yours into running the financial side of things. Might even give you a chance to start a family, too. After all, people will still be interested in drinking good beer next summer, boy. How’s that sound to you?”
In that instant, Ryan’s life had changed forever. The buzz he was feeling from the beer was nothing compared to euphoria that was now sweeping over him. He reached out his hand and his grandfather smiled at him again as he shook it. “You got yourself a deal.”